Letter to Oprah #2

Dear Oprah,
Monday’s show with Tom Cruise was sooo awesome! And his new girlfriend Katie Holmes – ohmygod!!!!! She’s just as cute as a little button! But really, don’t you kind of worry about Tom dating a girl 16 years younger than himself? Even if she was on Dawson’s Creek – I mean, really. What could they possibly have in common? She wasn’t even BORN when Mission Impossible was on TV.

Did you hear that Tom told Brooke Shields she shouldn’t have taken those nasty antidepressants to treat her postpartum depression? I guess Scientologists don’t believe in taking medicine, only vitamins. What if Tom and Katie have kids and she gets postpartum depression and he only lets her take VITAMINS for it? What if she like drowns her kids in the bathtub like that lady in Houston who was also real religious? I bet he’d be changing his happy cult-religion tune then, don’t you?

Anyway, is it me or was Tom TOTALLY hitting on you? I swear I was catching a vibe there.

Yours truly,



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