Goodbye old friend

Yesterday I decided to try a little game with an old friend of mine.  The game was called ‘how many times can I resist you?’  Turns out it’s not that hard and I’m still at it on this fine Sunday morning.

 The Marlboro Light 100’s (in a box) are still sitting on the endtable, where I laid them Friday night.  Untouched.  Today I plan to kick him and his other buddies (the ones residing in a carton in my briefcase) out permanently.  Like into the trash.  Ditto for the Galouises in the car. 

The other game I played yesterday was called ‘Let’s see how out of shape I am’.  Pretty bad it seems.  Beginner level aerobics  and 5lb weights were all I could handle. 

And I used to be so much better.

The couple of cigarettes I had 15 months ago during a weekend of partying, turned back into a pack a day habit a few weeks later.  Quitting time got postponed indefiniately. and walks with the dog dwindled.  No longer does the donning of a sports bra excite my little canine friend – the act which was always a prelude to a long walk – who now knows it only means a marathon housecleaning session, and not an activity that will interest him in the least.  

Anyone who tells you that smoking helps keep the weight off is a liar. tammilee.jpgThe dumbbells and exericse videos that used to sit next to the TV in the front room, have been languishing in a cupboard for the better part of a year.  Sometimes I think I can hear Jillian and Charlene and Tammilee beating their little fists on the cupboard door, begging to be let out, each one dying to be reinstalled as my personal trainer. With only each other to taunt, they probably really miss me – their star pupil who routinely hurled a hearty “Fuck you, bitch” at the television screen when things got tough.  Tammilee, especially seemed, to relish my hatred of her, and would only ramp up the torture with each epithet I spewed.  She’ll be so glad to see me later this week;  perhaps she will even smile.

Do not be fooled by her mild-mannered appearance.  Tammilee is a sado-masochistic bitch from hell.

So now I join my other recently-quit peeps – Venus and Chalie.  I said I was leaving the dark side, and this time I actually meant it.   

Now excuse me while I put on my sports bra…


19 Responses to “Goodbye old friend”

  1. 1 Red October 7, 2007 at 8:19 am

    Good for you, MsOB. It aint easy, but well worth it.
    Wishing you luck with the lack of shmokes and sweaty exercise!

    Love the word schmoke! Hate sweaty exercise, but it’s better when you turn it into schweaty.

  2. 2 anonymum October 7, 2007 at 3:10 pm

    we’re here if you need support….not sure what i can do from the other side of the ocean, but hey, i just thought i’d offer…
    on the exercise side, they say sex is one the best types of exercise there is…i figure you may as well have some fun while you’re at it…if you’re get all sweaty i can’t think of too many better ways

    I’m amazingly calm (don’t know why that is, but I’ll take it!). Am in the process of selling off packs of cigarettes here for $2.00 each. I’m such a capitalist!

  3. 3 poseidonsmuse October 7, 2007 at 4:14 pm

    Wow OB…Glad to hear that you are kicking the habit. Honestly, despite all of the people in my life that still smoke (or people that I have lost due to smoking-associated lung cancer), I am still not the type to harp, rant or berate my friends to quit (that’s actually how I got my mom to quit when I was 10, but she’s smoking yet again…).

    Good for you. You know who to contact, and you know where to rant when you get those Nick Fits…


    ps. Amum’s idea is brilliant…Now the sportsbra is coming off….!

    It’s about the umpteenth time I’ve quit…but each time becomes a longer and longer period. It helps that Ken doesn’t smoke. Everyone at work does, but I don’t have to be around it if I don’t want to be. The urge to smoke is not a command that has to be followed. That’s my mantra these days. On another note, I bought The Art of Happiness this weekend (Dalai Lama). One of the best books ever! Next month a movie will be making the rounds at the art houses called Ten Questions for the Dalai Lama. It’s a must-see for me!

  4. 4 Grace October 7, 2007 at 8:55 pm

    (((( OB )))) Hey, add me to that list! 🙂 I quit about 5 weeks ago…something happened this weekend, and I could feel the urge coming on. I quickly downed a little “Temptation”, and resisted buy a pack until the “crises” passed… so my heartfelt support is with you!!!

    By the way….I’ve got something for you at my place….

    Hey, I’ll stop by this morning! Congrats Grace! I don’t know about you, but I was sick of my hair smelling like smoke. Lots of deep breathing is my “cure” for cravings. They have thankfully been short and infrequent so far. My problem is when I drink, so that has to be done verrrrry carefully.

  5. 5 AnthonyNorth October 8, 2007 at 3:52 am

    Hi OB,
    I’m a failure here. Still smoke, I’m afraid. Although I eat properly, and regular exercise is a must with chronic fatigue syndrome.
    I’d forget the sex option for exercise. The first thing I yearn for afterwards is a ..
    … well, least said.

    I would always convince myself that smoking made me too out of shape to exercise, which made it a really good excuse not to do it! (except the sex part, I never quit that one…)

  6. 6 Deb October 8, 2007 at 6:36 am

    Good for you! And good luck with it!

    Thanks Deb! It’s going well. I’ve already made some extra $$ on my leftover cigs that I’m selling here at work!

  7. 7 RubyShooZ October 8, 2007 at 7:03 am

    Congratulations! I know someone who quit smoking and started exercising and lost 45 pounds. I wish you all the best. I noticed in your tags or catagories – sobriety – and it got me wondering what you meant by that.

    Have a peaceful day today.

    ~ RS ~

    Haha! Thought I’d use that one to underscore beating the nicotine addiction.

  8. 8 V- October 8, 2007 at 7:39 am

    Look back at all the other things in your life that you have overcome. You are a strong woman – You can do this!

    Yeah, but you know I’ve quit smoking about a million times in my life. But maybe this is the time I’ll never go back! Poor uncle Tom, he’ll be the only smoker left in the family now….

  9. 9 prisonmike October 8, 2007 at 10:23 am

    I’m so glad to hear it, sisterfriend.

    The best part is lying there at night waiting for sleep and hearing nothing. It used to be I’d lie there and cough, wheeze, hack and repeat at least 10 minutes until I could breathe in and out without a whistle or cat sound. That’s all gone. Andi said the other day that I’m so quiet it’s like I’m not breathing at all.

    Deep breathing helps my cravings too. Wintergreen Altoids too.

    The health benefits are very important, for me especially. But just as important is the knowledge that I can control my environment and my physiology. I’m not a slave to cigarettes anymore. That’s what feels good to me.

    A thought has kept popping into my head for these 10 days or so; What if I found myself somewhere that cigarettes didn’t even exist? Tropical island, Soviet Gulag, 30 days in an oxygen tent, etc. Would I go crazy and tear my eyes out? No, I’d deal with it and the yearnings would go away.

    Call me if you need to. I’ll do the same. Good luck, sis.

    I’m beginning to think there’s a disturbance in the force – this has not been hard. Here’s the really weird part though: When I was 30 and my dad was 50 (and now I’m 50, are ya following me?), my dad quit smoking by testing himself to see how long he could go without smoking. And he quit for 10 years that time. And that’s what I did. You know, I really didn’t set out to actually quit smoking on Saturday, it just sort of happened and the longer I went without it, the less inclined I was to light one up. OK, so far I’ve made $2.00 by selling my leftover cigarettes. I really should be ashamed of myself.

  10. 10 prisonmike October 8, 2007 at 11:40 am

    Here’s something else – Mr. Butt wasn’t your friend. He’s like the kid you tried to hang around with in school who constantly made fun of you in front of his friends, but he was so cool, you didn’t care. Just to be in his aura.
    Mr. Butt cost you money every day. He damaged your health every day, he made you stink every day. He forced you to segregate yourself from others for 10 minutes at a time, no matter how brutal the weather – every day. He burned holes in your clothing and car seats.
    The list can go on and on. He didn’t care for you or me. It was a dependent relationship.
    I’m still searching for one upside to the relatioship, other than the fact that I look cool with a cigarette in my hand.

    Yeah, but I loved Mr Butt cuz he was cool and just having him in my hand made me cool too! There’s no denying that one simple fact – smoking looks freaking cool, man! The problem was that he insisted on going everywhere with me and that kind of sucked.

  11. 11 Paul B. October 8, 2007 at 3:45 pm

    Good on ya… less cigarettes and more… anything.

    It’s going quite well. I feel really good!

  12. 12 Doktor Holocaust October 8, 2007 at 6:57 pm

    I quit smoking cold turkey at the end of July. having bronchitis at the time helped. of course, now I have a dangerous caffeine habit that means I only sleep three hours a night or less and I vibrate so fast that my clothes catch fire, but I’m not smoking.

    I’m a big fan of the cold turkey method. It’s the most effective way to quit – so they say. That said, I’ve quit cold turkey a whole bunch of times…

  13. 13 Arm Jerker J. October 8, 2007 at 7:50 pm

    This is so hard to do. I’m getting bad into a workout routine but can’t kick my beer a day habit! And I smoke when I’m stressed. But that just means I’m a pack every other month smoker…
    Good for you getting back into things. Maybe we should encourage each other!

    I thought about you yesterday during the ab workout. I’d rather do a thousand bicep curls than ten crunches.

  14. 14 romi41 October 8, 2007 at 10:03 pm

    That’s awesome OB, you can do it 🙂 (that sounds fucking lame, but I’m sticking to it 😉 )..BTW, I love how you’re selling off the ciggies (as I read above); as a recommendation, you might wanna focus on the 13-and-under age-bracket…I’m thinking those little runts will pay top-dollar….

    Oh damn! Missed the prime market didn’t I? I had hoped to just give my smoking addiction away to a 19 year old girl by telling her it would help her keep her figure…As it is, I’ve left the world with a void in the smoking gallery.

  15. 15 Spyder October 8, 2007 at 10:29 pm

    The hubby would point out a good looking woman he noticed & but when she would light up it would change his mind completely. Not that he was going to do anything. Both of us made it a point not to date people who smoked. Sorry! But we just couldn’t stand the taste or smell. Also, my grand father died from lung cancer. I’m so glad you have quit.

    I think that’s why smokers tend to hang together – brothers in arms and all that. Once it started to become an “outside only” thing, it got a lot harder to keep up. It’s strange to watch the old movies where everybody smoked. Ah, the good old days…

  16. 16 Doktor Holocaust October 9, 2007 at 10:35 pm

    Mark Twain once quipped that quitting smoking was the easiest thing in the world, and that he himself had done it dozens of times.

    Of course, i MISS the taste of smoke like crazy, but want to spare my lungs, so I am considering switching to occasionally relaxing with a pipe as a nice way to get my taste-o-smoke. I even picked which blend of tobacco I wanna try first. Bob’s Chocolate Flake, because it sounds like a breakfast cereal

    Cool. You could smoke your breakfast instead of eating it. Much more satisfying! I too love the smell of tobaccy.

  17. 17 anonymum October 10, 2007 at 2:39 am

    damn woman, those kids would have paid 50c each for those smokes!
    must have been the nicotine deprivation fried your brain…

    Haha! I considered hanging out by the school playground, but you know how parents are these days…always watching. That’s why today’s kids no longer have any fun.

  18. 18 writerchick October 10, 2007 at 8:21 pm

    Good luck, sweetie, I’m pulling for you. As a former smoker who keeps going back to the little nasties – I can say in all honesty, I hope you fair better than I. Prayers and hugs.

    Oh, same here sweetie. If I can get through 3 or 4 drinking engagements, then I’m good for a long time. My last quit was for 2 years so I’m getting better at it. I’ve smoked since I was 17 and those 2 years were the longest I’d been without a cigarette. Little nasties for sure.

  19. 19 speckledbiter November 17, 2007 at 7:36 pm

    Good on you for stopping the madness. Cigs are $6.10/pack here in Boston — so tell those buggers they got a bargain. $11 in Manhattan.
    I am right behind you and empathize with the “I can smoke one or two” and am than back to a pack/day. I will absolutely need to be a never, ever again-er.
    Catching up on your blog means you have quit for 6 weeks! CONGRATS! Spotty and I send our best from Beantown.
    Speckled Biter

    Glad to hear from you, sweetie! 6 weeks, can you believe it? Say hi to Spotty for me!

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